In my waning years, my capacities have diminished, especially my mind - my brain. I have little time to get through my routine to keep alive and work my way through the Bible. It's all that really matters. I am not going to take anything with me except what the Bible teaches.

I have spent years and years, decades, sorting through, studying all kinds of things which purport to tell me what I am doing alive, why I am here on this planet, are there any other planets where sentient beings exist, etc., etc. - questions that experts over the centuries have pondered with few arriving at any conclusions that make any sense; and then someone else comes along with something they claim is "better," contradicting them anyway.

In my studies I have found that there is no end of information about these things and my mind is so limited that I would never be able in my lifetime to cover all of these sources and then be able to decide what is reliable and what is not. I am just not that smart.

But then again, in my studies I have found a secret formula that has aided me in quickly discovering what is reliable and what is not which I learned somewhere around the fourth grade, like everyone else did - give or take a grade or two: utilizing honestly and objectively my language, context and logic skills. But like most other people, I contaminated this honest, objective approach with all kinds of fake reasoning in order to get along, keep a job, keep what doesn't belong to me, save face, etc., etc. But after many years I decided to go back to the basics of language, context and logic, and get to the truth.

I have discovered that if I read a few paragraphs from some source of information and find that the basic foundation of this source has critical contradictions in language, context or logic, then I can put it aside. So far I have found, utilizing the normal rules of language, context and logic that the bible as correctly translated from the manuscripts we have available to us throughout the world has no contradictions in it - so far. So I'll stick exclusively with the Bible until something better comes along.

I have written down more than 25,000 pages of observations from what I have read and am still writing - still waiting for that first contradiction to rear its ugly head - nothing, not a single flaw yet! It is so reliable that it is exciting, because if it is true - and now I believe it is all true, then I have an eternal destiny that is secure and wonderful - especially because it does not depend upon anything that I do other than to believe that what it is saying is true.

I know you have not taken the time to investigate these matters from any source adequately enough to argue with me. That's why our last phone call was not a good one. And I am convinced after all of these years that this is worthy to argue about because it matters where I am going after I die. Besides the Bible does say that we are supposed to argue about such things. After all, people argue their case in court in order not to go to jail or suffer lethal injection, so why not argue objectively, and accurately with the facts and evidence until a good conclusion - a scientific one that can be arrived at about who I am and why I am alive and where I will be going when I die; and what is my purpose? That means admitting when your argument is flawed and correcting yourself to get to the truth. Ego must take a back seat to the truth. I also know that you are stubborn and unwilling to muck your way through one passage at a time to see if the Bible is truly reliable. Perhaps you will change your mind. It will alienate others perhaps, but you won't alienate God any more. Better truth from an enemy than kisses from a friend, the Bible says. So I'll take that alienation so I can be with my true friends in heaven when I get there. I've found few in this life that think like I do. No one has ever presented to me an argument or a source that refutes what I have learned from the Bible.

The key problem I have is lack of time to sort through all of my emotions and reconcile them with a careful mature objective analysis anytime someone questions my point of view without doing their own homework. You have not committed yourself to doing this. There is no, "Lets agree to disagree," on this matter. It is not so trivial like what kind of dessert to eat after a meal.

I am not without emotions, but most of them and yours and everyone else's are flawed. I cannot operate without emotions but they must be directed toward good not evil. Hence my rationale must be motivated from outside of my own personal thinking. The best way to manage that is to simply study the bible like a good honest fourth grader. I cannot handle too many thoughts at the same time, so I take a long, long time to master each chapter. I spend months on one chapter at a time! On the other hand, it keeps me out of trouble by occupying myself with what is arguably beneficial. After all, I am not brain washing myself with a source of information that isn't reliable. But I must always verify how reliable the bible is by putting it to the test of the rules of language, context and logic. So far the thousands of hours of testing it have shown me that it is so reliable that I can rest easy as I approach my death.

My good friend Rich died just a few days ago - 80 years old. I used to speak with him every few days as he watched TV in the Rec room. He hadn't shown up for the last few days. I figured I just missed him. Then I happened to see his picture in the display case on the first floor for those that just died. He's gone. He respected the bible for a few things, but never gave me evidence that He believed in God's free gift of eternal life through His Son Jesus. I mourn for him, he was so close to salvation, but no banana! Now - right now he is experiencing the horror of never, ever going to experience the joy of life with God, forever locked in his unbelief. Nice man, but no gift from God of eternal life. I cannot imagine how horrible it must be to live from now on in an eternal nightmare - having to live within oneself - flawed forever, in anguish forever, no hope - when reliable hope was available all the time. He had a bible and we discussed mundane things in it, such as diet, and other temporal things. I never heard him utter the name of Jesus. We never took the conversation to things that matter. Rich kept that wall raised high. Just a few days ago I had a pleasant conversation with him, now he's gone forever. I'll see his sad face again, marching up to God's Great White Throne to be judged to see if he was good enough to be with God forever in heaven. Of course he will fall short, and be dispensed with. As nice a man as he was he won't make it. I will, I'm not good enough, but I took the free gift instead. I chose to do it God's way by believing in Him, in His Son to do it all for me. I'll be changed into a really good person with no flaws and maximize my happiness the way God created man in the first place.

So do five things:

Get a pen, a pad of paper, and write down from three different bibles the first 3 verses of John chapter one. This we can discuss.